Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Saving Ammunition for Later

A couple of blogs ago I used a term that you shouldn't save ammunition to use against your spouse.  This may be a new term for some or a term you are familiar with.  It means: don't remember all the things your spouse has done wrong or things that have bothered you about your spouse to use against them at a later date.  In example, you are having a discussion about how your spouse did not help clean the house.  Your spouse responds "well I help out most of the time" you respond "no you don't, three years ago in March I wanted your help and you didn't help."  That is holding ammuntion against them, you remember something they did wrong a while ago and instead of resolving it then you remember and hold onto it so at a different point in time you can use it to prove you are right.  This is not effective.  All that happens when you hold onto things your spouse has done wrong can hurt you, forgiveness is part of marriage, we are all not perfect.  If something does bother you, resolve it then, don't hold onto the ammunition to use against them later.

No comments: